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Me

What the fuck, you little bitch?

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. I’ll have you know I was the top of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn Japanese people"? I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am getting straight A's, and have a banging hot girlfriend. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Manchester United football team and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo. Thanks for listening.

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